My review of BloodRayne

Ok, I'm late, I know. I didn't actually see it in the theater. Under the circumstances people should understand, I think my sprained ankle kept me from seeing this, it kind of came and went in the theaters so fast that I totally missed it.

I first heard about BloodRayne the video game when one of my many sisters and I were browsing at Blockbuster for a movie or a game or something to do one Saturday evening. This game caught our eye. So we rented it. There is a story behind that, it tells of the stupidity of Blockbuster employees or the inefficiency of the company or something. I don't think people need to be told this, they are kind of stupid and think they are powerful because they work in a video store. Working in a video store does not make you powerful or smart, it makes you a video store clerk, it makes you no more powerful than the cashier at Walmart, and they all suck too.

Anyway, we got the game home and we loved it. I of course purchased the game because it amused me so. I mean there you are a vampire and you suck peoples blood. I'm a little warped I know, but I'm not the one that found the cheat code to make all the chicks in the game have big boobs, that was my sister. I'm also not the one that sat for hours trying to beat the game, although, as far as games go it was fairly simple, I'm not very good at them, but I could play this game, I just didn't want to spend all that time on it, if she was going to do it. What can I say, I'm lazy, I just watched her play most of the time.

When I heard they were making a movie, I thought, hey cool, let's see what they come up with. When I heard Uwe Boll was directing, I was even more interested. He's one of my new favorite directors, why? His movies aren't that good, but they crack me up. What movies, you might ask? "House of the Dead" and "Alone in the Dark," to name a couple of his most recent releases. So he's found his niche in video game movies. Hooray! The dvd's contain the funniest director commentaries I've ever heard, yes I listen to them. But I like him because he really believes in what he does. His passion is so awesome, you can hear the excitement in his voice when he speaks.

Now, I enjoyed "BloodRayne" more than the other two of his I've seen. The problem with Mr. Boll's movies most often seems to be the casting. I would never have thought someone would cast Michael Madsen or Michelle Rodriguez in a movie set in this time period. They do okay work I suppose, considering neither of them seem to have a very large acting range. I think Mr. Madsen does a great job in Mob movies or as a thug in general but here, I just didn't see him as a big hero. I could care less for Michelle Rodriguez's character, just like in "Resident Evil" I was rooting for her death the whole time. I thought the casting of Rayne was good, a relatively unknown actress. I thought she did a great job in this film.

Yes, there were many problems with this film, things that bugged me would be the costuming, yeah, don't get me started on that. The other thing, Mr. Boll seemed to sacrifice some of his fight seens for shots of people travelling across the countryside on their horses, um, like the many times this happened in "LORD OF THE RINGS." Okay, we get it they have a long way to travel. Then he used flash backs to refer to the big battles rather than actually having a big huge battle scenes, uh, unlike "LORD OF THE RINGS." This bugged me a lot. Perhaps this was to avoid actually filiming these scenes? Now the sword fighting they showed, the gore, that was hilarious, I laughed my ass off at some of the fighting and gore. And of course Mr. Boll had to include an unnecessary sex scene, I mean, come on Sex sells! Yeah, we just thought, what the hell? All in all, like in the past the character development was as bad as Mr. Boll has ever done, it seems to be where he always falls short.

I'd recommend this movie, definitely...